Tessa Wants A Tattoo (a.k.a. How to Miscommunicate With Your 5-year-old)

I have mastered the art of miscommunication with my sweet 5-year-old.  Seriously.

For example:

We had gone shopping for new soccer shoes for the kids and Tessa saw the flip-flops on display.  Of course, these aren't the $2 flip-flops, these are the $45 flip-flops.  No less than 20 times did I tell her she did not need shoes like that yet because it was still cold outside.  The following day we were driving the kids to school and Lincoln asked me what I would be doing today, and I informed him I would be voting on the school levy.  Tessa got real excited and asked if she could come with me.  She continued to go on and on about how happy she was to be going with me.  She then said in her "I know everything" voice, "Mom, I TOLD you I needed flip-flops!"  All of the other kids looked at her and asked her what in the heck she was talking about.  She turned to them in her sassiest manner and told them, "I need them because me and mom are going BOATING!"  She was a little less civic minded when I told her what I really was doing that day.

The weekend before we were at Joann Fabrics and we were waiting in line to get something cut.  As we walked around Tessa informed me (in I swear her loudest voice) that she wants a tattoo. The rest of the conversation went like this (with about 40 women waiting at the cutting counter listening in - one of whch had tattoos plastered across her arms):

Mom:  "Why do you want a tattoo?"
Tessa:  "Because they are so beautiful and cool."
Mom:  "Well, I don't think that is a good idea."
Tessa:  "Mom, I really, really, really want a tattoo.  If I wait until my #6 birthday can I get one?"
Mom:  "Honey, the prophet has told us that we should not do that to our bodies." 
Tessa:  "Why doesn't the prophet like tattoos?"
Mom:  "Our bodies are so special and sacred and we don't want to do that to our bodies.  And we don't need tattoos to make us realize how special they are. "
Tessa:  "Why doesn't the prophet like ballerinas?"
Mom:  "What??"
Tessa:  "How can I be a beautiful ballerina if I don't have a tattoo?"
Mom:  "Do you mean TUTU???  Do you mean the skirt that a ballerina wears?"
Tessa:  "Yes."
Mom:  "That is called a TUTU, not a tattoo.  And yes, you can have one."
Tessa:  "Thanks! What is a tattoo?"